


what family is for.

by kalihiro



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Gen, Heavensward Spoilers, Trans Male Character, also alphi helping her with some Complicated Feelings of Loss, im a sucker for found family, my wol is nonbinary she/they, there is /no/ romance here, trans alphinaud, wol and alphi bonding over Complicated Gender Things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:15:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24750676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalihiro/pseuds/kalihiro
Summary: in which the ever so strong warrior of light is too afraid to be weak and the prideful alphinaud is too afraid to tell her the truth.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	what family is for.

**Author's Note:**

> im realizing now that when i wrote this, i had no idea what fantasias were so that would essentially render this whole thing useless bc itd make transitioning ya know. easy. BUT LETS PRETEND FOR A SECOND THOSE DONT EXIST

"Ah, Eris. May I have a moment?" Alphinaud strut into the Rising Stones common area; a small, but determined smile being brought to his face as he caught sight of the famed Warrior of Light.

Eris leaned back in her seat, arms crossed behind her head. "What can I do ya for?"

"Pray meet me outside at your earliest convenience. Tis a matter I wish to discuss in private." 

Y'Shtola chuckled, waving Eris off. "Always such a professional air about that one. We can continue this later."

Eris nodded, sliding out of her seat with carefree grace. "Thancred, I expect my gil when we return."

"Oh, come on. We have yet to prove if your bet is correct or not." Thancred sighed. Eris grinned and waved to the group, meeting Alphinaud outside next to the aetheryte plaza.

“So, how should I prepare? My rapier is being repaired right now, but I’ve got my chakrams on me if these will suffice.”

“No need. I am simply going to pick up a delivery from the alchemist’s guild in Ul’dah.” Alphinaud instructed.

“And I have to come why?” Eris asked, watching Alphinaud begin to stutter and struggle to find the words. “Ah! You know you can just say you don’t wish to travel alone.”

“That is not-”

“Oh Alphi. I await the day you are no longer a victim to your pride. Onward to Ul’dah!”

* * *

"My apologies, Master Alphinaud. But we do not have the elixr ready for you just yet. If you could please allow us just a day or two more." The alchemist apologized profusely.

"E-excuse me?" Alphinaud stepped back, voice catching in his throat. "What do you mean it's not ready?"

"I sincerely apologize. We have been weighed down recently with ㅡ" 

Alphinaud felt as if the world had stopped. The alchemist continued to speak, but he could hear none of her words. He wanted to speak but his voice… _gods, his voice_ , he feared it might leave him any moment now. He took a deep breath, building up all the strength inside of him to finally speak.

"Unbelievable." Alphinaud stormed out of the guild, heels pounding against the carpeted pavement of the halls of the Hustings Strip. Eris apologized to the alchemist and Severian on her way out to chase Alphinaud down, finally grabbing hold of his wrist in front of the Royal Promenade. He turned to face her, his usual demeanor replaced by one of frustration, anger, almost fear.

“Alphinaud, what the hell is wrong?”

“I have had this order running monthly for nearly two years now and they can not seem to get it on time after all th-”

“Alphinaud!” Eris shouted, drawing the attention of the few people still lingering in the halls. “I am well aware you can be impatient, but there is something… different about this.”

Alphinaud cleared his throat and stood up to his full height, short as it may be. “I just think that they should be doing the job they chose to do.”

“They got an emergency order from a group stationed out in Limsa. Got caught in another fight with the Kobold’s and needed a load of elixr’s as soon as possible.” Eris explained. “I assumed you stopped listening after he said they weren’t done with yours yet.”

Alphinaud bit his tongue, holding back whatever sharp string of words he was planning on rattling off.

“Shall we grab some drinks for the road then find somewhere to chat? Away from the bustle of this city?” Eris held an elbow out for the younger boy to link his arm through. He obliged, albeit with some hesitation.

“Must we walk like this? I feel as though I am being paraded about like a child.”

“Aht- Stop that.” She brought her finger up to her ear, pretending to get a call through her linkshell. “An urgent message has just come through from the Warrior of Light herself. She is telling me that Alphinaud needs to loosen up a bit.”

“That is quite enough.” Alphinaud pulled himself from her grip and pushed her aside. “I am aware that the nature of this order is not known to you, but it was extremely important nonetheless. I invited you along for… Well, the reason is of no import. I will be nearby waiting for my order to be complete. You are free to go back to Mor Dhona if you so desire.”

"Oh, Alphi, I'm sorry. You know I didn't-"

"It matters not what you meant. I am growing tired of this conversation." Alphinaud stormed off once again, leaving Eris behind on the bustling streets of Ul'dah.

* * *

“A voice… modulator?” Eris cocked her head to the side, ears showing more of her confusion than the expression on her face.

“Essentially. It is an elixr used to deepen the user’s voice for a period of time. I understand Master Alphinaud’s anger in us not having the time to prepare it and I do hope he forgives us.” The alchemist bowed, apologizing profusely to Eris.

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Eris soothed the girl. “If I were to procure the ingredients myself, is there any way _I_ could prepare it?”

“Absolutely! It is relatively uncomplicated, but anything is achievable for someone such as yourself!” The girl’s eyes lit up with admiration.

“You flatter me too much." Eris blushed.

"If you will allow me just a moment, I will go create a list of ingredients and instructions! I trust you still have your alembic from before? We unfortunately have no extras at the moment."

"Yup, yup!" Eris nodded. She moved to the edge of the room, leaning against the wall as she waited.

The alchemist came back quickly, pen and paper still in hand. "I am sure you know the wildnerness around here well, but I wrote down locations I know have what you seek. I apologize for this trouble."

"It's no trouble at all! With things sort of on pause for me right now, it's a good time to start working on my non-combat skills." She smiled brightly, small fangs shining.

"I wish you luck, then! I will be here should you need anything, but I may not be able to come to you right away."

Eris nodded, taking her leave from the guild room, pausing in the hallway once more. She studied the paper closely, sighing deeply. "Relatively easy, huh?"

The locations varied greatly, forcing her to run all over Ul'dah. But she would do it for her friends, for Alphinaud.

She reached her first location with ease, getting to work as quickly as she could. She pulled out a small, hand shovel from her bag, something shiny catching her eye as it tumbled out of the bag as well. She picked it up, heart stopping for a moment as she realized what it was. The small replica charm of Haurchefant's shield glittered in the sun. She held it tightly, shoving it back away after a moment.

"Not now, Eris. You're helping Alphi right now. You're helping Alphi…"

* * *

Eris held the vial up proudly, examining the beautiful blue and pink liquid. According to the description on the paper from the guild, she achieved the correct final product. She called Holly, her pup, preparing a small note to attach to the collar. "Can you deliver this to Alphi for me?"

The pup ran around in circles excitedly as Eris made her way over to the door, opening it slightly for the animal to make its way out. She sat back down, resting her head on the desk. She had barely slept since… everything, deciding it was a good time to catch up as she waited for Alphinaud to, hopefully, arrive.

_The airship rocked side to side as it avoided the artillery fire from the imperial ship behind them. It was so hard to focus on anything before her. Ysayle slowly creeped into view, limp body laid over a block of ice. Eris felt sick as it approached, dropping the corpse on the deck before her. She turned around to vomit, being met by Haurchefant's cold body behind her. The bodies continued piling up; Minfilia, Alisaie, G'raha, Moenbryda, Thancred, Y'shtola, Papalymo, Alphinaud… Dozens upon dozens of faces stared at her — some she recognized, most she did not. They spoke lowly, repeatedly. "For you. For you. We died for you." A chorus of death rang out. Their hands reached out to her, pulling at her clothes, her hair, her skin. They were going to kill her, she thought. They were going to rip her flesh from her bones, leaving her to bleed, just like what happened to them. Just… like-_

Eris shot awake tears, streaming down her face as she kicked reflexively. She sent her chair flying backwards with the force. Her chest tightened as she watched the vial fly from the desk and hit the floor. The door flew open suddenly —

* * *

“Momodi, pleased as ever to see you again. I was told you needed to speak with me?” Alphinaud made his way up to the counter, greeting the lalafel. He bent down, picking up the dog he knew belonged to Eris. "Any reason as to why the message was delivered via pet?"

“A friend of yours is waiting in room 312.” She passed him a key and ushered him towards the inn rooms. He knew all too well who was waiting for him.

Part of him knew he shouldn’t have lashed out at Eris, he was the one to invite her after all. But she could not possibly understand why he needed this elixr and _now._

He stood outside the room, hand hovering over the door. But a sudden thunk and the breaking of glass was all it took for him to forgo the politeness of knocking and instead bursting his way inside.

“Eris-!” He shouted, all worry fading away as he saw the miqo’te on the floor, pink hair an absolute mess.

“Ah!” She screamed, hopping to her feet. “Damn it all, I broke the vial!”

“Vial of what?” Alphinaud’s eyes met hers, her purple eyes full of worry. His heart caught in his throat as he studied her, sure more than ever that she was crying beforehand. “Why are you covered in dirt?!”

“I was attempting to make your elixr for you, as the guild was so busy. And I had finally done it, but I, uh, got too excited and kicked the chair back and dropped it.” She pouted. "But give me an hour and I have it done again!"

"You needn't trouble yourself. If my lashing out made you feel like you _had_ to do this, then I sincerely apologize. I told you I would simply remain here until it was complete." Alphinaud sighed.

"I would've never gotten as far as I have if people getting annoyed with me was all it took to make me do something." Eris grabbed Alphinaud by the shoulders and shook him gently. "Listen to me, Master Alphinaud~ I am your friend and I will help you! Plus this is giving me a chance to work on my alchemy skills, which I've neglected for far too long."

Alphinaud paused, taking a moment to think deeply. “I am genuinely sorry for my outburst earlier. I am… currently a bit on edge.”

“If you’ll pardon my prying-” Eris began. Alphinaud shifted a bit in place, unsure if he wanted to hear the rest. “The alchemist at the guild was kind enough to instruct me on how to make this-" She paused, looking up at him. "As well as its base purpose."

Alphinaud felt his blood run cold and fear run through him he hadn't felt since his school days. "I can assure you-"

"Hold on." Eris put a hand out, shutting him up. "I can see you panicking and there is no need. I wouldn't have gone through all this trouble if I had deemed it something to be mad about. I'm here for you. Anything you might need, and I mean anything, I will get it for you."

"E-Eris…" The younger boy thought he might cry, right then and there.

"No crying! Look at me and smile!" Eris instructed. She grabbed Alphinaud by the cheeks, pinching his face lightly. "It makes us alike, you and I. Though, I never had to go through the trouble of voice modifying elixr's. Easier to make your natural voice higher than lower."

"Eh?"

"Well, uhm, _sort of_ alike." Eris smiled softly. "For me? Nyan-binary."

Alphinaud stared at her blankly, clearly unamused with the pun. 

"Okay, okay~ But it is the truth. I do understand, Alphi. I'm here for you."

* * *

"Alisaie is the only one that knows. Well, save for you now, I suppose."

"You would be the first for me." Eris took a long sip of her drink. "It's not like I've ever wanted to make a point of coming out to anyone, but I gotta say… It does feel nice."

"...I understand."

“I meant what I said earlier, Alphi. If you need anything, ever, just say the word.” Eris smiled softly to herself. “I haven’t ever really had family. When I was younger, maybe. But it’s from that time where you’re not really sure if it was all in dreams or if it actually happened, ya know?” Alphinaud hummed in response. “You can laugh all you want, but Haurchefant told me this in the past. Said that despite how different we look, we really did seem like brother and sister. Not that I want to take Alisaie's place or anything-"

"I know full well what you mean, Eris." Alphinaud reassured her. "You are someone I find myself depending on time and time again and I daresay it is a rather… comforting feeling to have someone with us that we could both look up to. All we've ever really had is each other, as such we are equals." Alphinaud turned to her, a soft smile on his face. "If she were here, she would doubtless say the same."

Eris gripped the hot coffee tightly, a million memories springing back up at the mere mention of Haurchefant's name.

"He would be more than proud of what you have accomplished." Alphinaud reached over and laid a hand over one of Eris'.

"I hope you know I care for you greatly, Alphinaud." Eris' lip trembled as she spoke. "I have lost many a friend, or… more…, to the dangers of this world. I have even lost my real family, I would not wish for anything to happen to the one that I have found."

"Eris…"

"You, Alisaie, Y'Shtola, Aymeric, all of you. Many have thrown their lives on the line to save mine, but I would not want that of you all." Eris shook the more she spoke, Alphinaud's comforting hand doing little for her as more and more thoughts came crashing into her mind.

"Eris, are you alright?"

"I would not be able to live with myself if I lost any of you." 

"Eris!" Alphinaud shouted. Eris jumped, dropping her mug and sending what remained of her coffee spilling down the rocky cliffside. "Eris, I ask again, _are you alright_?"

"I'm sorry, Alphi. I don't know what came over me."

"Clearly you have been keeping too many things inside."

"Perhaps you are right. I think I got a bit carried away." Eris laughed weakly.

"You needn't apologize. As you help me time and time again, I shall always be here to help you. To lend an ear or whatever it may be that you require." Alphinaud gripped her hand tightly. "After all, that is what family is for."

**Author's Note:**

> sorry that this is. such a mess. i wrote this way back in april when i was just getting done with heavensward and for Personal Reasons, i am very attached to the idea of trans alphinaud so i just wanted to write something. nice. bc the rest of the alphinaud tag is horrendous
> 
> but, because im me, there must be a little bit of pain. the way i picture my wol has changed since i wrote this, but i think thats perfect. here, shes still her usual self. shes a bit closed off, but still pretty happy go lucky when around the other scions. as she went thru the events of stormblood and shadowbringers, she started to wear down, becoming much more secluded. but she still feels alright, as long as she has the twins around, she feels that she can really be herself, no matter how briefly
> 
> im sorry if some characterizations are off, ud think id be more confident after having played 600+ hours but. that is not, never will be, the case LMAO


End file.
